Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
