Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
