I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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