at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
