Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
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