But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
