lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I feel great
I just peed on a car
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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