I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
How's work?
Spinning.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Randomize