Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Randomize
