The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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