just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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