Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
