we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize