i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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