Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Randomize
