4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
