I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
