I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
