The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize
