Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
it's like iHOP with fire
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
