On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I just got carded by a ten year old.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
