We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
