My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
