I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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