Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
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