She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I puked a lego.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
