Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
All I want is dick and wine.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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