2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize
