I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
