he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Just puked most of my soul out..
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