Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize
