No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Randomize
