wrigley field is MILF paradise
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
