Your tits are I can't wait for
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
