Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize