his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
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