There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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