Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
