Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
