no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
