A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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