I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Randomize
