sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
