Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
