he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
