Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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