omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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