i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
