i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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