So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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