im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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